Shock
by Repair Boy Valdez
Summary: "Does that shock you?" Jason Grace isn't sure what the think of that sentence, so he puts it aside. But as the years go by, he starts to wonder. [HOH-Spoilers, slight AU, time skips ahead of BoO, Jasico, if you haven't guessed]


_ Does that shock you? _

Jason doesn't come up with an answer, not for awhile. At least, not an answer he's happy with, an answer he doesn't feel guilty about, an answer he doesn't find odd to himself and how he thinks.  
And eventually, he realizes he does have an answer.

He can see it when Nico looks at Percy, a look of sadness and guilt and anger all wrapped into one, layered with a bit of love. Jason doesn't know what type anymore, but now he understands that it's been this way for years. Nico used the past tense, saying he had a crush on Percy, but sometimes Jason wonders whether it's true.

Sometimes, Nico tries to leave before anyone says anything. Sometimes he stands at the side, looking as though he wants in but won't feel right if he does. So one day, just before Nico is about to leave the edges of the campfire to do Gods-know-what, Jason gets up to stop him. The son of Hades scowls, but follows him to the fire, sitting down beside him. Jason doesn't say anything, and his glare when Nico isn't looking at him stifles any comments that may have been directed at Nico's stormy mood. He remains that way the whole night, as the stories and campfire activities continue.

Once, Leo set Jason's shirt on fire. It wasn't as though it was a new thing, although Jason would've preferred less of an audience when he yelps in panic.  
"Leo!" he yells, and it combines with the slight panic of the fire being so close and the attempted smothering of the fire. Leo's laughing at him, mimicking his shout, and even he can't help but laugh after a minute.  
Nearby, the demigods' antics have Nico di Angelo laughing, and when Jason looks over reproachfully, Nico only shakes his head. "Your _face," _he says, and Jason gives a huff as everyone laughs all the more.  
It doesn't occur to him until later that that's the first time he's actually heard Nico laugh.

Nico seems to want to be annoyed with Jason for continually dragging him to do things, but it's almost like he can't. Nico always seemed like a tough guy— and Jason does know that he is— but he's not unfriendly. And as much as he tries, he doesn't hate people. More people are asking him to join games and activities, and usually Nico declines, but sometimes, he accepts, and Jason thinks the effort of dragging him back to do things really was worth it.

They become really close friends, after awhile. It takes a long time, and Jason isn't sure how much Nico's opened up, but it doesn't matter. Neither is very keen on sitting down and discussing feelings, not at length. Sometimes Nico'll say something that means a little more than it seems. Sometimes Jason'll do something and Nico can see exactly what he meant. They're friends, and that's what counts.

It's a long time before Jason notices, even though it's a big difference. But Nico looks at Percy differently, and at Annabeth differently. Less like a lonely kid and more like someone who's a close friend. And then, Jason sort of gets it.  
Maybe it was in past tense after all.

It's another while later, when both are hanging out, Jason going over plans Leo'd shoved in his face, and Nico struggling through a book, every time minutes or so muttering about dyslexia or spelling a word out loud. Other than that, it's silent, but a comfortable silence. Occasionally, Jason can feel Nico's eyes on him, but he doesn't think much of it.  
Eventually, Nico speaks.  
"Thank you."  
Jason looks up, puzzled, turning to look at the younger boy.  
"Huh?"  
Nico rolls his eyes, muttering something in Italian, before speaking again. "For not— For— the whole _whatever _you do." Nico's gesturing with his hands (not that he doesn't usually, but it's almost bigger, if that was possible) trying to articulate what he means. "Thanks." It's obvious, even to Jason, that he feels foolish to have spoken up, and so when Jason gets it, he smiles.  
"No problem."  
Both go back to their own work, and nothing else is said for the afternoon.

Jason notices that Nico often speaks in Italian. Usually when he's annoyed— although not angry, because then he wants everyone to understand him. It's interesting to listen to, and Jason has to fight a smile when Nico glares around, daring anybody to cross his opinion, Italian or English. Months ago, the adjective _cute _would not be one to describe Nico di Angelo. In fact, he's surprised it applies now, but Gods, it does.  
Jason doesn't know what that's supposed to mean, so he doesn't think about it in detail.

Jason's gotten very good at picking up Nico's expressions over the past few years. Better than he is with most people anyways, and lately, the son of Jupiter can't figure out the glances Nico's giving him. Exasperated, almost, and a little annoyed, and almost _hopeful. _Jason doesn't know what it means.

Sometimes, Jason notices stupidly small things. The way Nico's grin is a little lopsided. The way he ties his shoes. Being able to tell what mood Nico's in.  
Usually, Jason can't even remember what he had for breakfast three days ago. But Nico sticks out in his memory, and he doesn't know what that means either.  
But the more he thinks about it, the more he thinks maybe it does.

One day, Leo makes a comment about Percy's shirt. It wouldn't be that notable, except the comment is "Your shirt's on backwards, Jackson. I don't recall it being that way before lunch." Percy looks at his shirt in surprise, before grinning foolishly, and trying to pull his arms back in to switch it around without taking it off. Through the laughter of the campers, he gives a telltale glance at Annabeth, who is trying to pretend the entire scene isn't happening. Or at least, it seems that way, until she looks up from where she'd been ignoring people, and speaks.  
"At least I managed to put my clothes on right."  
The camp laughs, and there's a whistle or two, as there always is in a group of mostly teens. For people in their twenties, Percy and Annabeth still act like they're teenagers, or at least that's how it looks to Jason. He can't help but cast a glance towards Nico, for reasons unknown, or maybe just unacknowledged.  
As soon as Nico catches him, he rolls his eyes. "No, idiot."  
Jason shrugs almost defensively, and Nico mutters "Always the blind ones. _Why."  
_ Maybe the statement should've stuck out to Jason, but it didn't.

At odd moments, Jason'll catch himself thinking about Nico. It starts out as him laughing, a few jokes, friends, and it's not too odd for him. But then, Jason has to admit if he let himself think freely— but they're friends. And that's that.

He and Nico are the last ones at the fire. Neither say anything, and it's sort of peaceful. There's some chatter from other places, but by the fire itself, it's just them. Nico breaks the silence, although not with something coherent.  
"Uh— So..."  
Jason looks up from the fire and the sight of the camp behind it, turning to look at Nico. He looks uncomfortable, and his foot is tapping, and he's biting his lip as though he needs to say something, so Jason waits for him to speak. When he says nothing, Jason adds in a "Yeah?"  
Nico still doesn't say anything, but the fidgeting continues, and Jason finds himself distracted by every movement the demigod makes, and it's a minute before he catches himself, and redirects his vision to meeting Nico's eyes.  
_ Does that shock you?  
_ And the Nico throws his arms up in exasperation, says something in Italian, and then the son of Hades has his hand on Jason's shirt collar and his lips on Jason's, and all Jason does is sit there.  
After a second, Nico pushes away, and Jason blinks at him. "Wha—?"  
"Sorry. I didn't do that. Forget it." He sounds angry, but Jason doesn't think it's at him, so when Nico stands suddenly to go, he catches him by the wrist.  
"Nico."  
Nico pulls away from him, but doesn't move, and Jason stands up next to him. "I said I'm sorry! It was stupid, and I wasn't thinking, and I—"  
"Nico."  
"Gods, I'm such a moron, I probably—"  
"Nico!"  
It's evident Nico's only tripping over himself trying to apologize, and he looks ready to bolt like he'll never come back, and Jason's reminded of the boy who first spilled his secret out to another, years ago.  
So he does the only thing he can do, and really, what he wants to do, but Gods know the only thing he really wants is for Nico to stay.  
He grabs the younger by the shoulders and kisses him.

_ Does that shock you? _

It shocks him that Nico's fallen for him. It shocks him that he returns to feeling. It shocks him that in the end, gender never actually mattered. It shocks him how much they both grew in the years that have passed since the statement was said.

But it doesn't shock him that he's fallen in love with a man. Sometimes, he wonders how it ever did.


End file.
